Have moved in to hall for 3 weeks now. Am lovin it(: Been busybusybusy, with little time to be quiet and write, but am curiously feeling the blood jet of poetry recently, to borrow a phrase from Plath (wow, I do miss her). Hall life has been intensive-games till midnight, followed by supper sessions till 2 am. It’s been a hassle surviving without a laptop, but thanks to wonderful neighbours who expose themselves for my exploitation, I’m scraping through(: Can’t wait to finally get Internet connection- hopefully by next week I’ll be able to write a post using my new Fujitsu Lifebook!
Just finished “The Screwtape Letters” by C.S Lewis, which is an amazingly cutting magnum opus. Indeed, good writing is like a double-edged sword, it pierces the heart and has the purposes of teaching, rebuking and disciplining. I think Lewis qualifies as such a writer-he must be happily scribbling away poetry beyond the pearly gates now. Well, it’s always inspiring to come across writings that seem so close to being God-breathed. Reading it gives me the goosebumps.
My progress in doing QT has been alright I suppose, but I feel that there’re fluctuations in the quality, heh. But it’s ok, I see God in so many small miracles every single day. Met up with Hui Xin last week, and it was extremely encouraging to see her devote herself to her ministry and still be focused on other mundane things like, oh, I don’t know, academic warfare at Cambridge. :p We had a long chat-it’s been awhile since I talked like that to someone. I miss Hwachuhumanz…
She shared an interesting analogy with me:
Imagine you were dying from an illness, and there was only ONE cure available- consumption of a special flower found on the top of the world’s most treacherous peak. I volunteered to traipse the mountain to obtain it for you. After getting the flower, I brought it to your lips. The logical progression would be for you to eat it and recover. I am not going to force it down your throat, but I want you to know that I risked my life to obtain that flower, and if you do not choose wholeheartedly, willingly to eat from my hand, you will perish. I guess this parallels the Lord’s sacrifice for us. Many (myself included) have questioned why Christianity has to be so “exclusive”. If God was so merciful, then why doesn’t He save everyone? But God gave us the freedom of choice, He wants us to be sincerely grateful, and to Choose to love Him. He took the first step by giving us His son, and it is totally up to us to reciprocate. Of course, we can choose not to, but then we will have to bear the consequences: denied entry into Heaven.
Indeed, His banner over us is love. God has already given us the maximum capacity of love, so we need not consciously rack up “good deeds” in order to gain brownie points to secure our entry to Heaven. We are merely trying to reciprocate His love for us. It seems so natural that I don’t know why I took so long (18 years!) to understand that! We will never stop sinning as long as we live, but this should not excessively worry us because our salvation can never be lost. It’s difficult to love thy neighbour as thyself, but I’ll always remember that only when you’ve finally accomplished that, will you be allowed to love yourself as much as you love others. I’m not going to make any excuses-I’m far from that ideal, and sometimes I find myself heading in the other direction, but it’s heartening to know that I have the campus ministry and so many other friends (I love you guys!) along for the journey. (:
Music: Alter Bridge-In Loving Memory
