Antony and the Johnsons

oh man, they make me cry

Fistful of Love

I was lying in my bed last night staring
At a ceiling full of stars
When it suddenly hit me
I just have to let you know how I feel
We live together in a photograph of time
I look into your eyes
And the seas open up to me
I tell you I love you
And I always will
And I know that you can't tell me
So I'm left to pick up
The hints, the little symbols of your devotion
I feel your fists
And I know it's out of love
And I feel the whip
And I know it's out of love
I feel your burning eyes burning holes
Straight through my heart
It's out of love
I accept and I collect upon my body
The memories of your devotion

Cripple and the Starfish

Mr. Muscle forcing bursting
Stingy thingy into little me, me, me
But just "ripple" said the cripple
As my jaw dropped to the ground
Smile smile

It's true I always wanted love to be
Hurtful
And it's true I always wanted love to be
Filled with pain
And bruises

Yes, so Cripple-Pig was happy
Screamed " I just compeletely love you!
And there's no rhyme or reason
I'm changing like the seasons
Watch! I'll even cut off my finger
It will grow back like a Starfish!
It will grow back like a Starfish!
It will grow back like a Starfish!"

Mr. Muscle, gazing boredly
And he checking time did punch me
And I sighed and bleeded like a windfall
Happy bleedy, happy bruisy

I am very happy
So please hit me
I am very happy
So please hurt me

I am very happy
So please hit me
I am very very happy
So come on hurt me

I'll grow back like a Starfish
I'll grow back like a Starfish
I'll grow back like a Starfish
I'll grow back like a Starfish

I'll grow back like a Starfish
I'll grow back like a Starfish
I'll grow back like a Starfish
I'll grow back like a Starfish
Like a Starfish...

It's poetry, heh, but strictly not for mugging listenership, which brings me to the another purpose of this entry:

Ode To Jay Chou's Fantasy Album (in my opinion, the best fecking mandarin album i own)

Year of purchase:2002
Location: Pirated cd shack in Hong Kong

IT'S easy listening, and i know all the lyrics by heart, his mumbling has attached itself irrevocably in a comfortable cranial corner (awwyeah, alliteration) you just flow with his music, and it's like listening to an old friend musing about life. i'm never bored of this album (i should know, i listen to it almost everynight). In fact, zhoudong eradicates boredom, you are suddenly not that tired anymore. the arrangement of the songs show a flow that mirrors the mugging process.
first you start out wistful, hopeful,(ai zai xi yuan jian~love before the western era, or sth liddat) then you start getting a bit frustrated, vindictive (the anti-mother-basher rap opus ba, wo hui lai le~ ahpa, i'm home). But you start to mellow, trying to convince yourself that it's all v simple (jian dan ai~simple love). you persevere as the night drags on (ren zhe~the tolerant one...it's difficult to translate the sublime poeticism of jay;p)you enter a period of existential panic as you realise that the fecking prelims are 3 days away, you ask fundamental questions about your existence, but you find out that (kai bu liao kou~my mouth cannot open) all you yearn for is to hark back to a simpler era (shanghai 1943) but you're suddenly reminded of all the blessings of the 21st century, and you feel slightly embarrassed about your incessant whining (dui bu qi~sorry la) the witching hours are the hardest to deal with (wei lian gu bao~the old castle with witches) you start hallucinating about macbeth's ghosts etc (no kidding)the climax is approaching! you psyche yourself up with a high-energy nanchaku flinging number (shuang jie gun~nanchaku). the end is nearing, the dawn is dawning you feel a sense of accomplishment from reading 2pgs of sloman, and you retire to sleeeep (an jing~quiet).

Right, that was my incoherent ode to mah homeboy jay chou. <3 him
ok, am off to listen to jay (:

because i'm a dreadful slacker.

1.

Han: So there's this cool james bond villain with a metal jaw and he goes around eating ppl
Nurul: how cool!!
Tong Wei: hey nurul, aren't you only supposed to eat halal food? but men are not halal
risse, shuki: omg, that was classic
Tw: i'm losing it

2.

Ian: yo wanna go kap to muggg?
Tw: no, it's damn late and i wanna go home. how abt tmr? a couple of us are mugging at orchard
I: no lar, i can't mug outside one

3.

N: I'm so not a pink person, it's so bimbotic
Tw: no lar, you look quite sweet in pink! and bimbos are Babes In Total Control of Themselves!
N: er, that's a bitch dear

(i hope the sublime comedy is apparent. heh)

4.
while watching a hot wushu babe practising her swordplay

I: man, she should just stay at home and cook
Tw: or she cld come right up and impale you with her xiaolongniu skills

5.

Joel: A Wife is a useful thing to have
All: rrrighttt
J: see, she can be used to Wash, Iron, Fuck, Etc

6.

Joel (again): hey, what to gays do when they fight?
Tw: what
J: they exchange blows



omggg, we're all dying, and seniors all leaving soon/have already left. feeling a tad desperate.

i told my mother abt applying to unis during dinner time, but then i added that not much hope shld be pinned upon them, cos i honestly think my chances are quite slim.

tong si then said: "then why waste money applying?"

right, thanks alot for the vote of confidence.

i suppose only self-doubt is tolerable.

Oh yeah, so apparently the whole film issue is now settled, cos we have sammysam sim who has emerged as filmsoc’s saviour. And what’s even cooler is that she makes a waayy better film v. head than pw-obsessed sl. Yes, it was truly a blessing in disguise. To think that sam didn’t run initially cos she was afraid of all the competition from the other elects. Now sl can screw off and bury herself in peeedubbb..ok will stop harping on the fact that she thinks pw’s better than actually having a cca.

In other news, we celebrated junyong’s birthday today, albeit being a bit late, but all the better, cos he was caught totally unexpected when we burst out with all the party poppers and related shit. Stuffed our faces with cake and GLORIOUS peanuts (: in a tribute to junyong’s nuttiness and his unforgettable peanut joke (ni men hen huasheng lehhh~ you guys are nuts) yayy, <3>

Btw, wasabi nuts are freaking funky lar, they make your nose so bad, but I guess that’s why some pple enjoy SM. (ohman, I did not just say that) haha, shld stop inventing weird allusions abt foos, I remember a particularly cringe worthy one abt erotic berries on zing’s b-day cake (they BURST in your mouth:) ok, am turning into a bawdy fool, and “ignorant as dirt!”

Talking abt which, we had a Peanut War after finishing the cake, which basically involved the peeps split along gender lines and throwing peanuts at each other. Sounds inane, but I assure you it was totally fun. Felt like I was back in orientation 04 again. Oman, sigh, can’t believe all this is going to end. I <3>

Well, was all in good fun. Oh right, we, no the guys were attempting to strip the birthday boy, when the attention inexplicably turned to ian. I don’t have a clue as to why, but ian has always been a favourite stripee object, haha. Funniest thing was when han chased ian all the way to Chinese high (er, that’s a pretty long way off, if you ask me), he got caught by some anal retentive teacher for running around and grabbing other boys (I suspect this is some underground clamp down on all homosexual activity in tchs…ooohhh) anyway, han landed his “lily-white Indonesian ass” (in his own words, mind you) in CS (corrective service for the uninitiated:p). we all had a good laugh abt it..heh

And there’s ld exco jts tmr!! Yay!! It’s at some posh place that our resident taitai keith picked out, called Merchant’s Court in Swissotel, and there’s buffet. Heh, keith’s so considerate(: oh no, am gaining weight like crazy, but hopefully I’ll be able to shed it all off at the end of the yr or sth (hey, I was at my skinniest post o’s and prom time) oh yeah.

Hmm, apparently xiaxue’s blog was hacked into, and all the 12 blogs and gmail account were hacked into. Singapore’s bona fide bog queen has just gotten jacked, but hopefully she’ll be back bigger and better. Cos she’s such a guilty bimbotic pleasure… heh

Right, better stop wasting so much time playing and start doing some proper work.

Ok, am off for dinner, then hopefully some productive time will be spent later on(: chin up girl.

sigh, everything seems to be falling apart now, sook lee, for some insane reason has decided to pull out of exco right after handover ceremony. wtf la. i smsed her to ask for an explanation abt her decision, and her reply was: "decision abt what?"
well, let's see, the decision where you simultaneously jacked 354646 ppl and any hopes of the cca functioning properly. she hasn't even started doing anything and she's already quitting. and amazingly, after she finally comprehended my question, she provided a couple of reasons, one of which includes PW. seriously, WTF?!?!?
am hyperventilating with rage now. wth did she even run in the first place. wisely refrained from calling her and stuck to using sms instead, cos i'm pretty sure i would have shouted some unpleasant stuff. following which, i would probably be decapitated by her despot of a father. (ok, am really pissed now...arghhh)

breatheeeee
wheew

will talk to her nicely tmr and try not to place her in WWF style headlock.
good grief....PW?!?! and i found out that she doesn't even have any other ccas.fine, she can remain an unparticipative, irresponsible, souless vacuum for all i care.

just really heartbroken that the club's gonna be interuppted cos of some uninitiated little twerp who decided to stand for elections just to see if she could get the post or sth. in retrospect, this makes all her earnestness at the interview so artificial.sigh. whatever, i'm sure gina can handle this :)
proof that abandoning the PEARLS system was a bad idea, cos now plenty of pple think ccas are no longer important. ok am getting incoherent.

arghh, am in no mood to do s lit presentation, which is tmr. oh no.

woohoo, school's out until thursday. i think the school's kinda afraid that we'll burn out or something, anyway, i love mr white!! heh, he exudes this sex-egenarian charm, and he's in pretty good shape for a sixty yr old :) haha, owell, back in school for some crappy ld thing. can't wait to FINALLY hand over. hmm, was pretty fun in retrospect, though i really felt like smothering some ppl a couple of times :X

can't believe that more than half a year is gone. arghhh, jc life is ending. i wanna start all over again, and i promise not to slack so much ;)

ok, really blogging just to kill time, cos i haven't got any angsty shit to pour out, but i've been surfing blogs, as usual, and ickleoriental's seemingly perfect life is sooo cute! she's in her twenties, has a deccent career as a journalist or something, has a cool "hubba"- some ex national sportsman. ok, being reallly sadd, cos i've nothing better to do. meeting a couple of friends at tea party tmr, so that should be cool. :) oh yeaahh, piggg out.

a bit of post blocks yayity here :) but berns just has to keep reminding everyone that it's "only 72 days to prelims" geez, i have a theory that that boy's gonna die young and possibly quite brilliant. i mean, coagulated yellow mucus plus dark red blood coming out of your mouth? that sounds like a case of dickensian consumption or something. hmm, hope he takes better care of himself. anyway, am quite screwed for geog, messed up one whole drq-omg. but, am determined to not worry about it for the next 2 days or so...the panicking can set in on tuesday.

spent yesterday bumming (aside from the first 3 hrs of torture in the morning) went to ian's house to watch a movie..heheh, being the cheapos that we are, we refused to fork out bloody 9 bucks for a movie, so we watched truman's show, which was pretty brilliant. i didn't cringe at jim carrey for a single moment in the whole 2 hours, so that was quite a record :) oh no, i think i'm turning into one of those vainglorious ppl who think they're above good ol' toilet humour :) heh. stuffed myself sick with pizza/pasta and gained all the weight that i lost during blocks mugging period-in the span of a SINGLE meal -_- carbs are EVIL !

ian's house rocks, and his room is really cute, cos his mummy buys him all these inspirational posters and he has them all over the room- "the strength inside you is the greatest strength of all" ,but his toilet paper was pretty creepy, they had pink flowers printed all over, haha. spent time talking cock and various gossipy shit. zing and i are both wallowing in our common ground-we're both loser tv junkies. haha, we'll watch anything, seriously. i proudly proclaim that i love channel 8. drama serials are strangely carthartic, and i am actually considering a career as a script writer. man, i'd have those aunties from toa payoh to jurong all tuned in.mediacorp will looove meee:) haha, am going a bit mad from all the tv watching- i counted-14 hours of tv today hoho. and waayy too many hahas. it's telling of my mental status whenever i repeat something too many times, haha.

then rushed home to change before heading out to meet sen n sherry for a concert at te third place. was expecting a whole slew of evangelical hymns, but was pleaseantly surprised. the band was cool, but it was the sharing that really meant somehting. :) those 2 girls were really brave to share something so intensely private with a couple of strangers, so kudos for their effort. i hope their faith never leaves them, cannot possibly imagine the devastation. but such things don't happen overnight, do they?

anyway, am beat, it's going to be a looong day tmr. have anthony's bbq thingy to look forward to!! haha, pig out session again:) life's gooood for now, and thank God:):):)

hmm, been spending an obscene amount of time surfing the web, reading blogs, gossip sites etc. quite a waste of time, but it's, haha, strangely enjoyable. just spent one n a half hrs on awfulplasticsurgery.com looking at celeb picks. yes, i know, it's such a loser thing to do. argh, wasting my life away. hmm, have been feeling strangely bad-tempered these days, esp towards ts. but seriously, she's morphing into paris hilton/random spoilt brat. she's bought a total of 3 outfits for her prom, which is more than half a yr away. goodness, and now she's complaining that she HAS to get a new skirt cos she's bored with the outfits (one of which she hasn't even worn,omg), n cos she accidentally worn one out before, so her friends have seen it n it wld be social suicide to let them see her wearing it again or sth. wth, ok this is all extremely petty, but i just get so irritated. got into a little screaming match with her just now which got both of us a scolding. ack. argh, ok breathe.

i feel like ripping up all her mini bikinis and halter tops and weird skimpy shit now. haha, i won't feel the pain, cos it's not like i can fit into those things anyway :/...owell, must stop being so whiny, on hindsight, i'm pretty spoilt myself. (ok, fine, this reflective, remorseful business isn't really working out)hmm, must learn how to deal with situations like this eg offer to save money by helping her sew her damn prom outfit or sth. thank goodness she thinks it's uncool to have it tailored, and has/will settle for a generic daniel yam thingy.

a week plus till blocks. quite scared cos haven't been too productive. watching waayyy too much tv. am trying to cut down on 7 pm drama serial, charmed, smallville, csi,friends reruns etcetc
hmm, on a slightly happier note, ld stuff's gonna end soon, so yay for that, just various admin loose ends to tie up now. film camp was alright i guess, really grateful to the pple who turned up, owell, it's our first time doing it, so admittedly it was a bit rough on the edges. kudos to sihui, shuhui, melvin,shumay,woes xi, keith, shuki, anna, sen etc for helping out. glad the kids (actually, i shld stop referring to them as kids, most of them are bigger than i am) enjoyed it. Mr Foo was cool, even though her brought some weird pirated copy of a movie and screwed up the video system abit.heh.

n sher's birthday is coming!:) here's an advanced happy birthday to u dear!!

omg. 12 am essay crisis. argh chaucer is kkkiiiiillllinggg meeeeeeeee. argh shit, still have not touched shakespeare stuff. am going to dieeeee. ok, just had to get away for a while and whine - how sad, to no one in particular. humph. and hate realplayer.

hoho, qing, you've gotta read this
SCUM Manifesto (Society for Cutting Up Men) was published by Valerie Solanas

Eaten up with guilt, shame, fears and insecurities and obtaining, if he's lucky, a barely perceptible physical feeling, the male is, nonetheless, obsessed with screwing; he'll swim a river of snot, wade nostril-deep through a mile of vomit, if he thinks there'll be a friendly pussy awaiting him. He'll screw a woman he despises, any snaggle-toothed hag, and furthermore, pay for the opportunity. Why? Relieving physical tension isn't the answer, as masturbation suffices for that. It's not ego satisfaction; that doesn't explain screwing corpses and babies.

Solanas argued throughout the entire book for the elimination of men:

Retaining the male has not even the dubious purpose of reproduction. The male is a biological accident: the y(male) gene is an incomplete x(female) gene, that is, has an incomplete set of chromosomes. In other words, the male is an incomplete female, a walking abortion, aborted at the gene stage. To be male is to be deficient, emotionally limited; maleness is a deficiency disease and males are emotional cripples.

hmmm, and i thought germaine greer was disturbing enough, in comparison to solanas n dworkin (suitably ghastly name btw..), greer's like a kindly old lady...heh

plus it's damn sad, the way she (solanas) tried to kill andy warhol after he refused to produce her play "up your ass" about a man hating prostitue (in classic tradition of art imitating life--or is it the other way round?--nevermind, you get the gist--play was prob abt herself), and her gun jammed after a few shots. apparently she thought a.w. was a vampire, so she spray painted the bullets silver. she initially wanted to wrap the bullets in silver foil, but didn't do so cos she was afraid the gun would jam (which it still did anyway.) sigh.
but the amazing thing was, a.w. refused to testify against her even though he barely survived the murder attempt (he never recoverd fully). hmmm, what did he feel for her? admiration?pity?owells, am feeling bimbotic today, so probably will not ponder such deep thoughts.heh.


in other news, am planning to see mr b soon, but wanna wait for a private moment, cos i don't want him insulting me in fronmt of so many others, quite devastating. but i've mentally prepared myself for all the horrib,e things he's gonna say. mr white will probably be more comforting, but sometimes you need somene to slap you right across your face to wake you up. and stop you from watching all thoses meaningless, time-consuming tv programmes--tv is evilll!!! oman, what do i see on wu zong xian--he's not even funny, in fact, his humour is pretty tasteless..ugh, must stop obsession with reality tv n other similar celebrity-generated crap.

production is starting to overwhelm, and the real work hasn't even begun yet. sigh, mild resentment towards k, wish he wasn't so lazy n non-commital. argh, and have film camp stuff to fret over. so why am i still wasting time blogging?!?! or/and being serial blog-reader--j's blog is DISGUSTING btw... "harvard or yale??? my heart says yale, but my head says harvard" she's collecting all the entrance acceptances like trophies n depriving othes of a place. damn immoral la. why apply when you already have other plans? humph, ok, am being shamelessly jealous of her. n peck! luckylucky girl who flew off to stanford yesterday. hmm, hope she brings back interesting stuff :)

still don't get numerical mtds.

ok well, will go off swimming now.
edit/haha, as if....):

http://www.mistersingapore.org/mistersingapore/Contestants/contestants.htm

Omg, was rofl at these poor dudes who have been conned into participating in this sad sack of a beauty pageant. Almost died when i saw the very conspicuous "Paya Lebar-Photo Not Available". Quite in anticipation of Mister Queenstown, but sadly he must have failed to make the cut. Which just goes to show what miserable people we have in fako ghetto land (think Queensway//Bronx:/)- I mean, what kind of pathetic hunk does one have to be to out-pout Mr. Toa Payoh and his bee stung smackers?!?! Mr Yishun positively looks like a computer-generated gigolo in Sims 5 or something. Mr Hougang has got to be the worst sod there, with his "I-wanna-be-a-black-eyed-pea" hair, I wouldn't be surprised if his previous residence was Queenstown (think of pseudo black street culture again).

ok, have not managed to wrangle some utility from insulting all these unknown people, whom i'm sure are decent guys in real life, but yeah, i'm just bored and in a foul mood.

am kinda looking forward to weekend (duh) cos there's humans party:) hmmm, seem to be pigging out every single weekend since christmas. not good for waistline.haven't excercised properly or prepared for nafa on mon, so am quite dead. plus have incomprehensible complex nos n utterly "huh?!?!" discrete r.v. to go figure out. plus all the usual econs and geog shit. argh, this is so sad, my life is so bitter. whine!!

on slightly happier note, there's all the pigging out n meeting with qing n sher going on this weeekend, sooo yayy:)

to sherry: any of these guys fit your wakeboarder/surfer profile? heh.

yesss, post blocks stress relief..ahhhaaaahaaa. went to watch the woodsman today w friends. was damn good, though highly highly disturbing. ok, am too wonked out to provide insightful analysis of the film, but trust me on this- it's damn goood!!! vv sad, cried a bit when robin (this 12 yr old that walter is trying to XXX) revealed her history of sexual abuse by her father.

Scene at the park bench:

W: Would you like to come sit on my lap?
R: What?
W: I said would you like to sit on my lap?
R: No, no thank you.
(R's face starts to crumple)
My father always asks me to do that
W: Do you like sitting on his lap? do you like it when he asks you that?
R: (crying by now) No
W: does he tell you weird things and moves his legs in funny ways?
R: (continues weeping.)

silence

R: would you still like me to sit on your lap? you know, cos i wouldn't mind.
W: no. no, it's alright. go home robin.


omgggg...kevin bacon is firggin good as walter, there're times when you wanna slap him upside down, yet you somehow accept that he's trying to change (with varying degrees of success, but the effort is commendable). ensemble cast was also vv good, even the side characters were memorable.

gahhh, wanna watch it again. heh, thank goodness we didn't go watch stage beauty or miss congeniality 2 (which han n nurul said sucked, btw.)

anyway, am in a laidback mood, and am determined to exercise a bit before major pigout session this weekend. (haven't found a stupid costume for the party yet, but i figure i'll just go as messed up corpse in brown sack. no need for much preparation there..)

also feeling a bit vindictive, cos joyce yap (ex fellow guide/ex-classmate from crescent) ripped off my cool msn nick. humph. but wth, this shows that my nicks rock. haha, even the ones that merely say tw. heheh. ok, am not making any sense here. but who cares, cos i'm happpyyyy:)

edit/
new musical discovery of the week: fiona apple!
am on a paperbag high. :)

uhh.freezing in the sch library now, pretty much wasted the past 2 hrs blog surfing...heheh, was hoping to be inspired by various success stories from the seniors.

qing: two of my seniors have set up a cool site peddaling their handmade earrings. it's quite a good idea, and theyeven have a page explaining the various modes of payment available. you n sher shld go check it out: rachaelandjudith.com :)

yep, owell. went for the uk uni talk on fri w sihui. spent most ofmytime there pigging out at the buffet table (damn, the chicken wings ran out real quickly...) the professors/administrators all sounded like tired otur guides. esp this guy called jo, who was v earnest and adorably nervous when talkig to us, he kept saying "okkaiiiee" in a british accent, and it was allquite endearing really, as compared to the law prof fr kings (forgot his name), who quite blatantly fell asleep during his collegues's speeches. hmmm.then went to pig out, and in the process talked to the edb hr person, who's in charge of interviewing aspiring scholars. i think i was quite rude then, talking with my mouth full n oily n everything. must have been quite a sight..haha. hah had to demand that i stop eating and leave so she could get home in time for dinner..heheheh.

saw quite a number of ex-cresecentians and various pri sch mates at the exhibition on fri n sat.hmm, quite petrified that we're all competing for the same thing(s).in othernews, i can't stop eating, i'm hoping against hope that all the weight i've gained is due to water retention, but somehowww, i don't think so.must stop binging when stressed.

and yesss! am happy for the seniors, who were all pretty happy with their results. 19/47 peepsgot their 4 As, and 32/47 got 3As or more. hx,mel,sheryl,zhuanghui,lynn,em,judith (of course), zhipeng(of course) all got their 4As.
stats:
19/47 got the perfect 432/47got 3 As or more. hmmm,according to my current class ranking, i'm left out !!! ddiieeeee. wail!!!rjc 56%-4Ashci: 43%-4As (i think, some rumours have it at 47%, but still....)
yup, it does look quite bad eh?
ah what the heck, will mug harder. or at least try.

cross country/ian's birthday gathering at nydc


ehh, quite fun(gathering, Not x-ctry), but mostly a massive exchange of gossip re KEITH. ahahaha..so scandalous, our good buddy. i always knew he was a bit of a casanova, but PENNY?!?!? omg, am shocked and vaguely traumatised. hmmm, shall not ramble too much abt k n xiaoqi in front of her fr now onwards. heheh...can't stop sniggering..ah, feel quite mean. then discussed antony n his depression/parallel w some deranged rg chick/bisexual tendancies towards joel (ahhaha) etc


ok, sadly birthday boy occupies the second spot as his fodder is not as juicy as keithy's. the nice guy (ian, not keith, he cldn't come cos Someone is more impt...humph.he actually ditched us a couple of times for her, that ungrateful brat) offered to pay for all meals but then we were too paiseh when the bill arrived ($230.39!!!), so we ended up coughing up our own cash, as a result, am terribly broke now, and jts tmr is going to deplete my cny stash...argh.... basically we just made alot of noise there, but no one really noticed cos everyone else was ...engrossed. anyway, i have a comppliant!!: nydc is friggin ineffiecient, my plate of all american ziti pasta came like 20mins after everyone else's food had arrived, (leon n jyhc finished their pastas before mine had arrived.wahhhh) 3 ppl spent 10 mins counting the orders 5 times before they were convinced that my plate was not in front of me. irritating lack of food added on to general feeling of starvation and heatstroke from the horrible crosscountry. (which EVERYONE ponned except for the competitiors. eeps. haha, my placing was a v miserable 126...)

anyway, am rambling on: then we walked over to ian's house (yesss, the lucky shit literally lives in the middle of orchard road..humph)., sang teh v nice bday song, took pics with his parents and slacked by the pool for a while, then hcpple left him to fend for himself with his ac khjakis. err, apparently there's some sort of weird ac tradition to strip him, so most of us didn't reeallly wanna be there for that.

yup, then by the time i got home almost midnight and all my mugging intentions dissipated by the time i finished bathing (still having a bit of a headache now, though i didn't drink last night. (quite proud of meself :) initially thought it was brain freeze from all the ice cream, but now i think it was the bloody blazing sun during the run--> heatstroke.waahhhh) (ok, am whining alot, but wth.)

cap submissions due on mon, but i haven't finished editing ANYTHING, and hpf hasn't replied, but i'm not really frazzled....yet, let's All Wait Till Sun Night before we Panic k?

i think i dismiss teenage angst waayyy too hastily. antony tried to jump off the railings outside the lt on fri. jonny had to pull him off, and sihan and tee counselled him for like a few hours. i was too freaked to speak to him again until that night, but i called mrs lim and had her inform his dad, who came over for dfeste. yayy, glad he was feeling better after father-son /male-male bonding session :). anyway, he seemed quite alright today,joked a bit, and he even came over from his usual seat beside the curiously silent alvin (i think i spoke to him a grand total of 5 times this past yr...quite sheepish about that) to mingle. mingling is good, and it's much too often maligned for being shallow. one can't always be talking about life, death, sex, love and loss right? haha.

yup, will need to be friendlier, i remember nurul telling me once that i seemed so dao during the first week of sch..seemed to have lost my thick skinned egotistical friendliness after sec 3. *shudder* ok la, sec3-4 wasn't THAT bad....haha;p

am meeting hpf tmr w jy n nurul, and i've got shit to give her la. feel like i'm wasting my mentorship, we talk waaayyy too much crap when we're together. should stop rambling on about iraq/democracy/education in sg etcetc and various other murky issues and focus.hahaha. (ok, this haha thing is varying from the cynical, sarcastic to the plain perverted/retarded) want to go watch some romcom play at wheelock w them after meeting ends:)

tee's being weird as usual and asking everyone to marry him. i think he has some sort of quota to fulfill or sth. anyway, shall try to emulate his mugging successsss....arghhh

love cny (yes, the festivities are still going on in the ooi family, had another reunion dinner yesterday, am growing fat, and the fact that i've had to adjust my skirt buckle is testament to this. i don't have the courage to step up on the weighing scale :/) wanted to go jogging today, but got pulled out by sherry to Walk Around Aimlessly. (wasting our youth staring at lights;p)alright, i think we spent 1 hr plus mugging (futile...) in macdonalds. will go jogging later, and am thinking of bringing tyson in case i get mugged (ahhh, the irony of words..haha. sorry). he's damn irritating, ruining all our furniture, clothes,shoes etcetc. but i'm trying to tame him. can't really bear to give him away. plus bambi's really lovable as a pet, but probably an utterly inept guard dog. haha (i think this one falls under resigned loyalty. or depravity) remember folks, emily is not crazy, she's just mad.

i think i can only blog for a short while until it becomes intolerable.

yesss, dramafeste is finally over. humph feel a tad underappreciated tho. sigh, the backstage org team never gets enough kudos. haha, ok, will stop whining. argh so many essays, so little time.

i saw a flattened mynah on the road last week, with one of its compatriots picking at it. Funny how your friends literally eat you up. i saw the same mynah today, even flatter, crushed by a hundred more cars. its claws were strangely beautiful, spread out like a yellow flower in a dried pressing. the whole road a black strip of a book mark, made by an obscenely morbid being, for the undecipherable book that is Singapore.

************************************************************************************

mildly scandalous discovery: ho poh fun has been carrying a torch for arthur yap for a looooong time, tho he's already got a gay partner (the current one is caucasian)... hmmm, wonder if she knows she's being played like an old fag hag. sad, really... will gently bring it up the next time if see her. (gasp, she wants to meet on v day, cos she doesn't have plans. unfortunately i'm sad n undesireable as well, so i'll be free then. haha.)

There’s still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
There’s still a little bit of you laced with my doubt
It’s still a little hard to say what's going on
There’s still a little bit of your ghost your weakness
There’s still a little bit of your face i haven't kissed
You step a little closer each day
That i can’t say what's going on

Stones taught me to fly
Love, it taught me to lie
Life, it taught me to die
So it's not hard to fall
When you float like a cannonball
There’s still a little bit of your song in my ear
There’s still a little bit of your words I long to hear
You step a little closer to me
So close that I can't see what's going on

Stones taught me to fly
Love, it taught me to lie
Life taught me to die
So it's not hard to fall
When you float like a cannon..

Stones taught me to fly
Love taught me to crySo come on courage
Teach me to be shy'Cause it's not hard to fall
And I don't wanna scare herIt's not hard to fall
And I don't wanna loseIt's not hard to grow
When you know that you just don't know
-Damien Rice

omg, near obsessed w this song, am looping it ad nauseum, tho am not sick of it--yet.
Damien Rice rocks! but i like a cover one of his fans did..err naomi something or other.
find it here: http://www.eskimofriends.com/mp3.asp lol, look for cannonball by naomi and danny. :)

Human time does not turn in a circle, it runs ahead in a straight line. That is why man cannot be happy: happiness is the longing for repetition.

-Kundera.


Wahhhhh....

went for a jalanjalan session w qing and sher at chinatown yesterday. loved the crowd, tho i'm not sure the other two liked it v much. had a headache for most of yesterday, was foolishly thinking that my eyesight was failing due to unhealthy reading positions. sher provided enlightenment and said that it was probably cos of all the "heaty" stuff i've been eating...hehe, yeah, on hindsight, that's a likely reason... -_-
stuffed myself silly yesterday:

`yin yang dessert (walnut + almond paste-hot)
warm familial feeling, shared various (peanut, seasame) concoctions w 2 vv good friends!

`char quay tiao
i think i gulped down 10 tablespoons of oil, but it was good ($4 tho). then got a tad disgusted by the cockles, cos just after i finished praising them and asking sher n qing to try some, one started to ooze weird reddish black juice from its centre. was kinda piqued, then proceeded to set up "inedible and evil pus oozing marine bivalve mollusks" section on my plate and used my spoon to dissect all the other cockles, whereby they produced a pool of highly questionable liquid. the worse bit: the liquid blended right in with the rest of the dish, black, slimy, a bit bloody. cue plath who says morosely:"the blood berries are themselves, they are very still" lol

i went on to finish the whole plate. (haha, qing ate some too, but i think sherry was secretly disgusted by my dinner but had the courtesy not to say so...)

`chinese rojak w extra you tiao cos qing whined to the tattoed but surprisingly nice rojak uncle who wanted to pass his baton in the art of rojak making to qing... ("ni yao xue zou arh? zhe yang cha cha lor, haha")

`happy vegcrisps
basically a very unhealthy dish that uses a v healthy main ingredient. no one wanted to eat it when i got home cos apparently they had a HUGE dinner while iwas away. humph

`sampled alot of goodies along the way. what! they were offering k...

ohwells have the urge to write sth nice abt yesterday, been feeling like i'm wasting my mentorship, havn't written anything properly for almost a month. eek. will send ms ho a nice cny card to remind her that's she sorta loved... :)